Options for Vacation Plan
The scent of summer vacation is in the air. Though there remains another hump, the final exam, our mind seems to running off to somewhere. How can we enjoy our summer vacation happily? What differences can we make through vacation? I think that three options may be considered for our summer vacation plan according to your focus.
First, if you are interested in earning money, getting a job can be your choice. You may get a part-time job such as working at convenience store, coffee shop or restaurant. You may get paid 4500~ 5,000won per hour. Last summer vacation, I worked at a coffee shop as a part-time job and I ended up buying an airline ticket for Japan. If you want to earn more money, you may get a full-time job.
Second, if you want to build up knowledge, there are lots of ways you can do during vacation. You may attend summer school to make up classes you failed. You may find out language institution to improve your language skill. Maybe you will take culture academy such as making floral arrangement or tea ceremony. I liked reading books in community library and it gave me trivial but interesting knowledge. Relaxed vacation allows you to do what you want to do.
Finally, if you are willing to see the wide world, it is time to leave. You may plan overseas trip or travel around the country. Just by leaving your familiar environment, you encounter various people and events. Your experience will go on beyond your knowledge and your world will be expanded. A couple of years ago, when I went to Cambodia to see my friend, I met coexistence of poor and happiness. Through the trip, I realized how small the world that I live until now was.
Depending on your focus such as money, knowledge, or experience, your vacation plan changes. Therefore, for your meaningful summer vacation, you need to ask yourself: how can you enjoy your vacation? What differences do you want to make? Then, follow your heart and have a nice vacation.
Your topic of your writing is about categorizing one's vacation plan, which is the same thing as mine!
ReplyDeleteWhat I liked about your writing is that...
1. I really loved your introduction. It was really like novel, especially romantic one. When I read this expression, I felt that you are such a great writer!
2. I would like to say about your length about the writing. I think this is just an enough length. It is never too long but at the same time, never too short. Therefore, I think it makes readers feel not so hard about reading through all the essay understaning all of your main point.
3. This is the same context or same story that I told you in number 1. I liked your very last sentence. "Follow your heart" really impressed me. The reason is that although this is an academic writing and especially mine is really boring to read, yours seems very lively and interesting to read. When I read your essay, I also follow your mind and I am thinking about my vacation, deciding what to chose. This is great because I think my essay seems just An essay, not make readers excited or interested reading it.
It was very good to read your writing!!
To talk about the improvements that you can make...
I think there can be another phrase choice instead of "have a nice vacation". I personally think this expression is a bit more monotonous than rest of your writing.
It was very nice 5 paragraph story. I think your writing was very clean and simple to read. I liked the way you classified three ways to enjoy vacation. I felt little bit sad that option 3 is not really the choice I can make. :) About grammar stuff, Im' really afraid to point out since I'm not so sure, but I want you to check if this is right to say 'our mind seems to running off.' I guess maybe you should change to 'seems to be running off.'
ReplyDeleteWhen I started to read your writing, I liked the first part when you described 'the scent of summer vacation is in the air.' I think it is brilliant to say that, because I sometimes smell specific time or seasons. I think how about changing this to just 'summer' instead of 'summer vacation.' I guess everyone would be easy to recall the smell of summer instead of smell of vacation.
Thank you for sharing your vacation suggestions!
Finally, if you are willing to see the wide world, it is time to leave. You may plan overseas trip or travel around the country. Just by leaving your familiar environment, you encounter various people and events. Your experience will go on beyond your knowledge and your world will be expanded. A couple of years ago, when I went to Cambodia to see my friend, I met coexistence of poor and happiness. Through the trip, I realized how small the world that I live until now was.
ReplyDeleteDepending on your focus such as money, knowledge, or experience, your vacation plan changes. Therefore, for your meaningful summer vacation, you need to ask yourself: how can I enjoy my vacation? What differences do I want to make? Then, follow your heart and have a wonderful vacation.